Be Kind!
Note from Ruth:
Being kind is nice, right?
Of course, but how can we take this “be kind” message and implement it in all our daily interactions?
Being kind comes into play when interfacing with someone who has some traumatic experiences that cause them, at some level, to remember the trauma. Emotional triggers can happen anytime, anywhere and in any given circumstance with anyone regardless of all that makes us different. That would mean that I would have to be kind to everyone all the time.
Yep! Several years ago, I was in the Starbucks drive-through and when I drove up to the window, the Barista told me that the person ahead of me paid for my coffee. To tell you that I was floored is an understatement! That was a small, usually insignificant, part of my daily experiences, however, I remember it as if it were yesterday. Someone was kind to me and it still gives me a warm feeling inside.
We can be as kind as we possibly can, but that doesn’t mean that someone wouldn’t be triggered. If a person has the strength to tell you, let’s welcome that and inform them that you appreciate that they have shared this with you, and it was not your intention but that you will take that information to become a more sensitive/aware person. That’s it. No need to dig any further as their trauma is theirs to share or not to share.
However, what if you are the one triggered? It becomes your decision to share it with the person. You can be “ready” with a script for how to inform others. However, whether you share or not, there are some steps you can take to self-regulate. Take deep breaths, process your feelings and even distract yourself. We each need to take a self-inventory to find out what soothes us. After all, at the end of the day, we can only be responsible for ourselves and not others.
Let’s each work on being kind so as to be part of the solution instead of contributing to society’s problems. Kindness is universal and such a simple intervention to maximize the wellness of everyone around us.
Be well and be kind! – Ruth